Destiny In Bloom

THE FIGHTER

THE FIGHTER

posted on May 2nd, 2011 / by Nancy Smith / 32 Comments

He, she, they. It, them.

I’m a grammar dork; I embrace this about myself. I love words; the way they feel, the way they sound, the infinite puzzle involved in the writing process. Which one goes here? Which one fits better there? Does that wording communicate the thought in my head?

I especially love gender-specific pronouns. He. She. I think I even love them in a story more than named characters; when I see a character’s name replaced with a generic ‘he’, my mind is free to imagine that person however I see fit.

She.

She. The power of that pronoun in a piece of writing is palpable; even the shape of the letters implies characteristics of the person attached to it.

Femininity is often misunderstood; defined in terms of appearance, domestic ‘respnsibilities’, even the amount of ‘bling’.

Sorry, chickies; that ain’t biblical.

She is powerful. She is strong. And SHE is a complete representation of the glory of God, in and of herself.

Woah. What?? Did you get that??? You, my dear female friend, are a complete thought. The whole enchilada. The whole shebang.

Turn with me to Genesis 1 (I’ve always wanted to say that). Look – there, in verses 26 and 27: “Then God said, “Let us make man in our image, after our likeness … So God created man in his own image; male and female he created them.” (ESV, emphasis mine)

I’m a bit of a stickler for chronology, so here’s my nugget: These verses come before Genesis 2, where the whole “It is not good for man to be alone” thing happens. You remember – Adam looks at the animals, doesn’t find anything (what??); God puts him to sleep, does some surgery, and fashions (hee hee) a woman from Adam’s rib. Bada bing, bone of my bone, bada boom, there’s Eve.

Yikes. You mean, contrary to some teachings you and I have likely heard, Eve wasn’t an afterthought, an addition, an ‘oops, I forgot’ on God’s part? Even if it wasn’t stated that overtly, it sure was implied.

Nope. She was part of the plan from the beginning.

I have a friend who puts it this way. She pictures the Trinity sitting around a table (round, of course), having a conference. God the Father says, “Hey! I’ve got this GREAT idea. WHAT IF we fashion creatures, in our image?” The other two agree, so Father pulls two sets of blueprints out of the paper tubes, hangs them up, and says, “There!”

TWO sets of COMPLETE blueprints. Not one set, then modified to create another. Two complete sets, both representing complete aspects of the image of God.

There was a popular movie several years ago, where the big ‘romantic’ moment had the lead male telling the lead female, ‘You complete me.’

Did you hear me gagging? Yeah, gagging. This perpetuates the myth that somehow, I’m lacking in myself what only a partner can make up for me.

But that ain’t God!! Yes, we are lacking; there’s no doubt about that. But no other human being can make up that lack; only God can. But way back at the beginning, when he designed human beings, he made each of us to completely represent a part of his image. Together, we make a complete picture of his glory (at least as complete as we can, this side of eternity), but neither one of us are missing anything in and of ourselves.

Wow. That was muddy.

Ok. Let’s look at this another way.

In Genesis 2, when God says he’s going to create a ‘helper’ suitable for Adam, that word has little or nothing to do with who cooks dinner or washes the undies. Unless, of course, washing undies is a military tactic.

Which it might be.

See, that word there, ‘helper’, is the Hebrew word azar, which, translated, means ‘to surround, to protect, to succor.’ It’s used in a military context when the reinforcements come in. Reinforcement. Shield. Protector.

Huh. Ain’t no dish washing there. We’re in a war, folks.

This is not to say you shouldn’t wash dishes. I believe in clean dishes. I just don’t necessarily believe that ‘barefoot, pregnant and in the kitchen’ was God’s design for Eve. I don’t believe it wasn’t, either; but I believe my God’s design for me had a much more significant purpose.

I’m a fighter.

I’m designed to come in after the first wave has ‘taken the hill’ and support, bind up and encourage. I’m built to be a shield, to hold the enemy at bay for those under my keeping.

See, all the way back in Genesis 3, after Eve ate that blasted apple, God cursed the serpent with my enmity. John 10:10 says, “The enemy comes not except to steal, kill and destroy; but I have come that they might have life and have it more abundantly.”

The enemy doesn’t even show up unless he’s gonna try to steal from me, kill me, or destroy me and those under my care.

Not in my house, dude.

That’s my role, right there. Not in my house.

I’m a shield. I’m created to fight back, to be fierce. To war for those I love with everything I have, even when the clouds look blackest and I really just feel like throwing in the (dish)towel.

But here’s the deal. The other half of that little ‘curse’ back there? Yeah, that one. The one where we got pain in childbirth and all that other stuff that makes me kind of want to go kick Eve in the shin. The other half of that was that we’d ‘desire our husband.’

Yeah, not that kind of ‘desire’. The wording there indicates that we’d desire his position and authority. But wait, girls – this doesn’t just apply to married chicks.

Ever since then, women have had an innate desire to control. Sure, yeah, not you. Of course not. But the rest of femalekind fights daily with all different kinds of control issues, whether we’ve got a husband to aim them at or not. The feminist movement, although vocal, wasn’t the first group of women to claim superiority over men anytime they could. Check out Proverbs; it’s chock full of warnings about women.

We seek that control in a myraid of ways, too; manipulation, emotionalism, non-emotionalism, sexual issues, self-righteousness, bullying (yes, we bully, girls. You know it and I know it), verbal vomit. She can be angry, she can be a martyr, she falls easily into any of the ways she knows how to gain control. We elbow our way to the front, no matter who we trample on in the process. We can be jealous, competitive and petty.

And by doing so, she’s abdicated her place as a shield and taken up a weapon never intended to be hers.

Ladies, if you’re offended with me right now, and I’m willing to bet my favorite over-priced latte that some of you are, I challenge you to examine your own heart. You’re yelling at your screen right now (I can hear you in my own voice), saying things like, “I’m not gonna stay home and wipe noses!” or, “I can be the CEO, thank you very much!!” Or my all time favorite, “I need a man like a fish needs a bicycle!” (What?? I never understood that one, even in my psuedo-feminist days.)

Truth is, no, you don’t. You have all of God there is to have, and you reflect all of the image of Him you were intended to reflect. Completely.

But in order for the body of Christ to function as it was intended, we women need to understand our function and embrace it.

We’re warriors.

I don’t care who goes in first or who goes in second. Each line is necessary for the victory to occur. Your function, ladies, is to be encouraging, supportive and to build up.

Can you do that at home, while wiping snotty noses? Yes.

Can you do that behind the counter at Starbucks? You betcha.

Can you do that as the CEO of a major corporation? Absolutely. And you’d better.

See, it’s not about what you do, it’s about who you are (Huh. Think I’ve heard that one before). You can function the way you were built to function wherever you function.

The men in our lives, whether they be husbands, co-workers, friends, bosses, underlings, sons, what have you, need us to function in our role as a shield. My husband needs me to take my place behind him, weapon at the ready, to support and encourage him when he needs it, and to have his back when the enemy attacks. My son needs me to hold the enemy at bay, saying, ‘Not in my house!’

My guy friends need encouragement from me to be who they were created to be. Men that I might happen to come into contact with need me to have resolved my control issues, and be a safe place to see Christ. It doesn’t matter where I draw my paycheck from, or if I draw one at all; it matters whether or not I have settled my identity as a woman.

Head back to the rib thing. What’s a rib for? Support. Without it, the body collapses. Ooh, that’s good, right there. Without the rib functioning as a rib, the body collapses. The rib doesn’t get to say, ‘Nope, I’d rather be a kneecap.’

Ok, I know that analogy breaks down a little. But don’t let that distract you from the truth – you were made to hold things up. Not by forcing your way in, elbowing your way to the front. No. You were made to hold things together with encouragement, support, love. Kindness.

That’s how you fight the enemy. When he comes to steal, kill and destroy (which he will), pull out your sword, stand your ground, shielding those in your care, and fight: ‘Not in my house!’

Embrace your she-ness. Embrace the ferocious warrior within, and stand your ground. Be willing to be the encourager, supporter and shield you were meant to be. Lay down your need to be ‘first’ (elbows can really hurt, by the way), and face your control issues.

Fight, ladies. It’s what you were built for.

32 Responses to “THE FIGHTER”

  1. Hurray- go Nancy! I am NO MAN! I can revel in the secure knowledge of the specific, purposeful uniqueness for which I am created. Christ follower. Wife. Mom. Grandmother. Business owner, sister, friend, speaker. The traditional and the non-traditional. I am not a reworked afterthought! In order to exemplify the image of our glorious God, it required He and She! And I also rejoice in the position of the "she" in the equation. Warrior, providing support to the Adam in my world. Encouraging, building up, reinforcing him – and fighting shoulder to shoulder with him as well. Not competing with him, but joining him as we complete the representation of our Lord! Thank you for this piece, Nancy. It was many years before I discovered the freedom that came with knowing who He called me to be!

  2. You're an incredible writer Nancy, thank you for sharing that gift. I couldn't agree with the content more, but I love your style of communicating it.

  3. AWESOMENESS!

  4. Great job, Nancy! Love the article.

  5. Absolutely love!!! Thanks for sharing this with us Nancy! So inspirational and uplifting!! You've laid it perfectly, walk in confidence over status EVERY day.

  6. I needed this SO BADLY today – thank you so much for the nudge I needed!

  7. Nancy,

    Great work as always. Very thought provoking. I am glad to have female warriors in my life (like yourself) in addition to my fellow male warriors. I know this post pissed off the enemy because if only one woman reads this and goes into war the damage done will be detrimental!

  8. What a perfect truth to start my work week! Thank you for this, Nancy. I know I needed to hear this!

  9. Thanks, Nancy! I needed this reminder today. Standing and ready to defend!

  10. I love, Love, LOVE!!!

  11. Nancy, I mean, you just Rock!! that's it- your'e amazing and this is a SUPER word!! thank you!!!

  12. So good! I mean, REALLY good. Nancy, I love how you speak the truth and get right to the heart of a matter.

  13. Amen and amen! That will preach sister! In fact, it is! :)

  14. Excellent article. Loved the words… loved the grammar… loved the pronouns… loved the meaning!

  15. I think I need to read this every morning when I start my day!! Love it!!

  16. WOW! Preach it!

  17. How powerful it is when as women we walk in the role God intended for us. Rather then run from it, run into it. Keep on walking Nancy and when needed pull out that sword and battle.

  18. This was so good! I'm not a big reader, but this was totally awesome! I could tell you all the reasons why, but I'm too lazy. Just know you totally rock and now I have to go pray ;)

  19. "Not in my house, dude." WORD!
    "I’m a fighter." MY ANTHEM!!!
    Girl you know I'm behind you … chanting, maybe yelling a little … HECK YA!
    LOVE you … Love where God is taking you and how he is using you to encourage women!
    ~Ris

  20. You hit it exactly, Nancy. This is what men want and even expect (ok. would LIKE to expect) of their wives. Put your back against mine and help me take on this fight! Sometimes the wife is the better fighter. The fierceness in which you defend our covenant, our home, and our future can sometime lie a little heavier on you than it should, but your strength motivates and strengthens us. Your shield is also a weapon. Don't underestimate how much the enemy fears that shield!

    I love the way that you and the other shield maidens of DIB continue to train our wives in the arts of warfare and general butt kickery.

  21. What a great word!!! So true, and very encouraging and confirming!
    Thank you!

  22. Hey Nancy! Really good post and it is a message that definitely needs to talked about more.

  23. Great post! I wrote one in my blog a few weeks ago, with the same picture! Haha! Crazy!
    http://www.graciousgreenwoman.com/2011/03/march-c…

  24. "Be willing to be the encourager, supporter and shield you were meant to be."

    You are SUCH an encourager, support, and shield in my life. I love and appreciate you. Exciting to see the way your gifts are giving expression to who you are as you impart to others. Love you!

  25. LOVE this!! I've been sharing this exact thing with as many women as will listen!! :-) I AM NO MAN! (I have a shirt that says that!) Great article!!

  26. Wonderfully done my sweet sister!:)) Love reading your stuff. You are a great mentor to all of us who know and love you. Thank you.

  27. Love it, Nancy!!!!!

  28. What a beautiful picture of power under control!! In this world & in my life I fight for what's mine – my husband, my family, place in Christ. It's a battle I was fashioned to fight …. Thanks for encouraging me & women to be the portrait of God's heart! I'm honored to fight & I'm blessed by your life & your transparency. Thank you, Nancy!!

  29. Excellent word, and it was needed today. Funny, how that happens….. Unfortunately, my flesh learned a whole lot of control and was allowed to have full reign for many years. I must continue to crucify it and pick up my sword everyday. I say yes, Lord, I will be the shield you want me to be.

  30. AWESOME!!! Nancy I dont exactly know you but I love you! And I love the fighter in you!

  31. Fantabulous!! Am forwarding your article to several female friends who need this inspirational message :D

  32. Fabulous! Simply FABULOUS!


i.e. http://www.yoururl.com