Breaking News: There are some people in the world who see things in extremes.

If you are not one of those people, then I can almost guarantee you know someone who is. Someone who will immediately tell you whether something is right or wrong. They are usually deeply passionate about truth and justice, and can seemingly boil down an issue in the blink of an eye. Many negative-sounding labels have been attached to these folks: black-and-white, critical, judgmental, offensive, obnoxious …

How do I know such things? Because I am a black-and-white thinker.

I will admit, a lot of us can be brash and a tad bit abrasive. Some of us just like to argue, and some others of us have no control over our mouths. We tend to evoke emotion from others–be it good or bad–regardless of the topic at hand. We are passionate! And the saying “often wrong, but never in doubt” applies to our breed in an uncanny way. (Wink, wink!)

I guarantee–if you are not one, then you know one.

Life is difficult for BWT’s (black-and-white thinkers). Most of the time, we feel like no one really gets us, no one understands the weight of the “rightness” we’re proclaiming. We can be in a casual setting just chatting it up, when all of a sudden we find ourselves in an awkwardly tense dialogue about politics or faith or other such topics. It is simply because we BWT’s don’t like fluff; we like meaty conversations about deep things. We don’t have time for riff-raff or drama. We call it like we see it.

Well, in my thirty-five years, I have learned a few lessons that have helped me to navigate life as a BWT. Indulge me, if you will.

1.  Seeing clearly is a gift. In the list of motivational* gifts in Romans 12:6-8, it is listed as the gift of “prophecy.” A person with the gift of prophecy sees the world in black and white. They operate on the idea that what lies between right and wrong, good and evil is a giant chasm of death–not just a gray area. In the fleshly operation of this gift, a person can be critical, negative, prideful and abrasive.  But, if surrendered to the Holy Spirit, a person with this gift can be a powerful voice of influence over other people’s lives. A person with the motivational gift of prophecy can speak the truth of God’s word into someone’s heart and see it affect immediate change. A person with this gift can lead a group of others confidently in the direction of God’s heart. If you’re a BWT, then consider it a gift.

2.  Truth without love doesn’t get the job done. As a BWT, you must learn to temper your words with love. Just because you’re convinced you are right doesn’t mean everyone needs to know it. Just because you know the answer doesn’t mean you have to take the podium and start preaching. If you do not have a relational basis of care and love with the person upon whom you are about to lay this amazing truth, then most likely, they will not be able to hear it from you. Love is the only wavelength on which the truth can reach the hearer. If you don’t have a deep love for people, then it’s best to keep your mouth shut.

3.  Listening skills are essential. Because we think we always have the answer, most of us BWT’s aren’t very good at listening to others.  The good news is that you can develop your skills in this area. It takes practice and focus, but you can do it. The key is placing value on the other person–her thoughts, her passions, her hurts, her heart. If you truly value someone and have a foundation of God’s love for that person in your heart, then it is so much easier to put your “rightness” aside and actually hear what she is saying. Make a point to work on your listening skills in every conversation, and before you know it, you will turn into a GREAT listener. Listening to someone’s deep heart cries can sometimes make more of an impact on their souls than any right answers you could ever tell them.

4.  Loneliness is an invitation to go deeper into God’s heart. For all of you BWT’s who also have the motivational gift of prophecy, I’ll bet you have noticed a pattern of loneliness–or at least standing alone–throughout your life. Your convictions drive you to isolation sometimes, and you find that life can be very lonely. I remember several times in my past just ACHING for a friend who understood me. God, in his sweetness, has brought a few of those special friends along my journey and I am so grateful!  But I know intimately the depth of longing that happens when you feel alone. It was in those times that I heard the whisper of the Holy Spirit inviting me to come deeper into God’s heart. I was desperate enough to follow …  And that is when I found out how amazing God is!  He truly can be your everything. He can be your best friend. He can be your husband. He can be your confidante. He has been all of those things for me. If you are feeling alone and misunderstood, just quiet your heart and you will hear the Holy Spirit’s whisper:  “Follow me deeper into God’s heart. He will not disappoint you.”

5.  You are not your gift. Once someone finds out their spiritual gifts profile, they easily slip into believing that they ARE those things. “Well, if I see everything black and white, and my gifts assessment tells me I have the motivational gift of prophecy, then I must focus on being that. That is who I am.” Sounds kind of right, buuuuuut it’s not. Your identity is: CHILD OF THE KING. CO-HEIR WITH CHRIST. RIGHTEOUS. ADOPTED. ACCEPTED. BELOVED. CHOSEN. POWERFUL. WORK OF ART. When you start to identify yourself by your gifts, you take your eyes off the Giver of the gifts and start living a less-than existence that only orbits your fleshly ability to wield that gift. God’s purpose in passing out spiritual gifts is for you to serve His Body, the Church, and to build His Kingdom. The gift of prophecy is yours to use under the influence of the Holy Spirit to serve others. Use your clear thinking to bless others and encourage them. Use the sharpness of your words to slice through the enemy’s lies in someone’s ear and usher in God’s voice. But at the end of the day, don’t expect to hear God call you by the name “One gifted in prophecy.” No, He will run to meet you in the lane and hug you tightly and say, “Well done, my precious daughter.” You’re family, not function.

I think the biggest thing that we BWT types need to remember is that our words are sharp. They can be used as a sharp sword to cut down the enemy’s work, but they can also be used to cut our friends. We must keep a guard over our lips, my BWT sisters. Let love be your default setting. Let love be the sheath for your sharp sword. There is a time for battle and you will get to inflict some damage to the opposition, I assure you. But you only get called up in the ranks when the Captain has seen you submit to His ways.

So, I leave you with this challenge: get on your face before the Lord and make a habit of surrendering to Him. Be filled with His Holy Spirit, because that is the way to have power for living this Christian life. Let His Word dwell in you richly. Seek out opportunities to bless people with your words. And then let the fiery prophet rise up! Draw your sword and lead the charge for the Kingdom!  FREEEEEEEDOM!

*Prophecy is included in all three major lists of spiritual gifts in the New Testament. Romans 12:6-8 is the list of “motivational” gifts from the Father, or what motivates you through life. Ephesians 4:7-16 contains the list of “ministry” gifts from Jesus, the offices of apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor or teacher. I Corinthians 12:7-11 is the list of the “manifestation” gifts from the Holy Spirit.  Every believer in Jesus has a motivational gift. Prophecy in this motivational instance is identified most easily by someone who is deeply moved by justice and truth, and who will speak up about it. There is a distinction between this use of the term “prophecy” and the Holy Spirit-gift of prophecy listed in I Corinthians 12. Every believer who yields to the filling of the Holy Spirit can prophesy, regardless of which motivational gift or gifts one might identify in his life. New Testament prophecy, as listed in the Holy Spirit-gifts, is the building up and encouraging of the Body of Christ, the calling out of treasure and gifting in others and the confirmation and spurring on of the work of God in others’ lives. A person can operate in the manifestation gift of prophecy and be very “prophetic” in how they live, and not necessarily have the motivational gift of prophecy or identify with the term “black-and-white thinker.”

Crista Ashworth

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