In Life and Death
posted on June 16th, 2010 / by Ben Moreno / 8 CommentsThis past January Ben & I visited good friends in the hospital just after they delivered their second child Vanya Sophia. Unfortunately, little Vanya was delivered stillborn at 34 weeks because the Umbilical chord had wrapped around her neck four times. Little Vanya’s parents were, and still are, devastated by the loss of their little girl. The loss was unusually difficult for us because I was pregnant and due one month after Vanya was to be born with our third child. As we all mourned the loss of Vanya I began battling fear. I knew that what happened to our friends could happen to anyone. I was not guaranteed a healthy child – even though that’s what I desperately wanted. John 16:33a says “Here on earth you will have many trials and sorrows … ”. That is definitely NOT my favorite verse. Unfortunately, we all know it’s true. We have all experienced trials and sorrows of various forms. We all know the gut wrenching reality of hardship, fear and pain. Over the next couple months I continued to fight off fear. I was living with the reality that the same thing could happen to me. But, I knew that God didn’t want me to live in a state of fear. How could I do that not knowing the outcome of my own situation? John 16:33b states that though we will have trials and sorrows “Take heart, because I have overcome the world.”
A song that brought this truth home to me was “Nothing is Impossible” by Planet Shakers. The Lyrics are:
I’m not going to live by what I see
I’m not going to live by what I feel
Deep down I know that you’re here with me
I know that you can do anything
Through you I can do anything
I can do all things
Because it’s you who gives me strength
Nothing is Impossible!
Through you blind eyes are opened
Strongholds are broken
I am living by faith
Nothing is Impossible!
This song was a reminder to me that no matter what we faced God would give us the strength to make it through the situation and overcome through Jesus Christ. The time came for our little man to be born. I continued to fight fear but I held on to the truth that God was with me & he would give me strength. Finally on March 17th, at 4:44am little Judah was born. We were so glad for his arrival and also shocked as we realized the Umbilical chord was wrapped around his neck twice. Judah was fine but that was the last thing we wanted to see. Today Judah is strong, healthy and almost three months old! Yet we are still carrying with us the sobering reality of sorrow from the loss of Vanya Sophia. Words can’t express how we feel when we see Vanya’s parents holding our little Judah. Unfortunately sorrows & trials will be a part of our lives. But we all have hope. Jesus Christ has overcome the world! The sorrow that we feel today is not final. Someday soon we will experience the full reality of Christ overcoming the world. It is only because of this truth that we can face today. Right now God is calling us to completely embrace every day that we are given. We do not know what the future holds. Whatever God brings to your hand, Do It! Do not hesitate! Go for it! Don’t worry about tomorrow. Live Today.
“Lord, teach us the brevity of life, so that we may live wisely” (Ps. 90)
Ben & Rachel Moreno lead worship at Valley Creek Church in Flower Mound, TX. They met at Christ for the Nations Institute and married in 2004. They are the proud parents of 3 beautiful children. Izzy 3, Lydia 1, and Judah just born in March. Our current favorite songs are: Nothing is Impossible by Planet Shakers, Overcome by New Life and I Will Exalt You by Hillsong.
You can read more by Ben Moreno at: http://www.worshiptable.com
Visit Valley Creek Church’s website at: http://www.valleycreek.org
"Someday soon we will experience the full reality of Christ overcoming the world." Thank you for the reminder that this eternal perspective is our strength during trials. I think I forgot that, somewhere along the way. It isn't that we need to be released from the suffering today. It's that we will one day see how every pain was conquered at the cross.
My path was set straight this morning.
AND God even used your bio to speak a new thing in my heart about somewhere I am supposed to be headed.
Blessings Moreno family! (My husband Jason and I used to go to Valley Creek, so we were delighted to see you on DIB.)
Thank you so much for writing for us! Your story brought tears to my eyes as I remember first hand struggling with fear of losing my baby during my last pregnancy due to having lost a baby unexpectedly the pregnancy before. Thankfully, our sweet little girl is now 16 months old! I loved your challenge at the end to live today! Life is but a breath and we all have a specific purpose for our time here on this earth. Blessings!
Good word Rachel. It was really cool to see you and Ben walk that road with Vanya's parents. I really did see God's strength flowing through both of you. Thanks for sharing this and encouraging others through this blog. Keep it up!
Ben and Rachel – thank you for writing about this 'hidden' fear that so many of us battle in secret. I too lost a little girl, Ariel at 32 weeks, in 2005, and prayed for years before I became pregnant with our little Judah.
The joy and fear that comes upon you simultaneously seems like an oxymoron, and you feel that you can't voice the fear because it will overshadow the joy. Now I give "Praise" back to God for giving us our son who is now 14 months old. Congratulations on your little Judah as well!
What a great word–especially for mothers and expecting moms. I believe that at some point all pregnant women are struck by the same fear. Moms and Dad sometimes worry over the health and safety of their children. This was such a great reminder for me. I hate the feeling of fear when it grips you (if even for a moment) and your post is truly freeing for all of us. I love the WORD! God's love letter to all of us! How blessed we truly are…
P.S. Thanks for allowing God to use You! Kel- glad you invited them to be your guest bloggers 
Wow, thanks for such a transparent post. It really meant a lot to me. My sister died about a year and a half ago and all the platitudes in the world don't get you through it. Only believing in God's love and goodness will do. Really enjoyed this post.
Great blog you too! Thank you for sharing your story with us on DIB!
Rebecca
Rachel- Thank you for this. We all have struggles, but I love your encouragement from John 16:33- God has already overcome the world. And I felt your passion at the end, "We do not know what the future holds. Whatever God brings to your hand, Do It! Do not hesitate! Go for it! Don’t worry about tomorrow. Live Today." Good stuff! (PS. I went to CFNI and graduated 3rd year youth in '97). =)