Destiny In Bloom

Hand Raised High

Hand Raised High

posted on October 16th, 2012 / by Melissa Aulds / 41 Comments

On Sunday October 14, 2012 we gathered together to honor over 600 sweet babies who had been lost to miscarriage, stillbirth, infant death, SIDS, birth defects and abortion by handwriting their names onto a banner.

We also partnered with Intelligender, Beyond Words Designs and to host the We Remember You Walk where we walked to honor the lives of the babies as well as the grief of their parents and families and also to raise money to purchase Art Cards to be distributed by Dr’s and Hospitals to women experiencing a loss.

Today we are so happy to announce we also have a very special gift from the author of Empty Arms, Hope FIlled Heart, Kristine Lemus. She is making her e-book available as a free gift from her to every babyloss mama who wants it. It is a beautiful prayer for any woman who has lost a child. You can download it Here and read more from Kristin at it will be available as a gift for one week ending Oct 23, 2012.

You can also view and download high-quality images of the walk, including close up shots of every section of the banner so you can find and download the picture with your baby’s name on it at Beautifully-Chaotic.

Why do we do all this?

The loss of a child is something no mother should have to go through. But sadly, 1 in 4 women will experience the loss of a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth or infant death. So how is it with numbers that vast so many women walk through it alone?

I remember sitting on a couch, surrounded by about 50 amazing women in my Lifegroup (my church’s name for bible studies) just a week or so after finding out that instead of a baby 12 weeks along, I was carrying a baby who had passed at 8 weeks and I would have to have surgery to remove my baby. I had the surgery and had recovered enough to go back to my group. As much as I wanted nothing more that morning than to lie in bed and cry I knew I needed to be there.

I can’t remember exactly how I ended up talking about it but somehow the whole mess spilled out of me in a torrent of tears and raw pain: I hurt. I hurt so badly I could hardly breathe sometimes. I was confused. I was angry. I was SO angry. I would go to sleep crying and wake up crying with my pillow so soaked I must have been crying while I was asleep. I would have confusing dreams that the whole miscarriage had been nothing but a nightmare and my baby was fine, only to wake and have the whole reality crash down on me again and again and again. I felt so alone and lost…

I can see the group leader’s face so clearly in my mind still, her eyes were so full of compassion as she turned to the entire group crammed in her living and dining room and asked how many women there had experienced a miscarriage or loss.  The rooms were peppered with the raising of hands. I was shocked to see how many of my friends, not just people I kind-of knew, but friends had lost a baby. I had no idea.

Then she spoke the words that first set me on the path to healing, “Honey, you need to grieve; your family needs to grieve. You lost a family member, a child. So many times we don’t give enough weight to losses like this and don’t find healing because we never grieve … take time to do that.”

I learned that day that I was not alone and as I drove away after group I made two decisions that have proved to be incredibly important…life-altering even.

I would grieve and find healing.

I would live my life with my hand raised so no one I knew or that my voice could reach would ever feel as alone in their grief.

If you have lost a baby I want you to know you are not alone. I am so sorry for your loss. All of us who joined together, we are so sorry for your loss.  Please feel free to honor the life of your child by leaving their name/date in the comment section below and I will add all names left by Tuesday Oct 23, 2012 to the banner and upload pictures of that section to Beautifully-Chaotic.

I will remember them with you.

We will remember them with you.

41 Responses to “Hand Raised High”

  1. Soooooo Beautiful!!!!!!!! :) ) Thank you from the bottom of my heart for honoring my babies together with every one whom submitted their babies names and the precious ladies whom walked with us in honor of their precious babies too!:))

    Love Always
    Ana Marie Gierhart

  2. Great video :)

  3. Jordan Scott Bentham 2/25/1998

    My friend's sons David & Gerald.

  4. Melissa, I love this. Thank you for being one who raises her hand high!

  5. So beautiful and touching!! Thank you for all the work you put into this. This makes my heart happy and I know it is blessing many moms with empty arms.

  6. My sweet baby boy loved always and forever
    Cohen Bradley 6/7/2012

  7. Thank you so very much!!

  8. Christian Rhyse Land 4/2009

  9. This is beautiful! Please add my daughter Sarah Bobbi Sirico (7/23/12). Thank you!

  10. Thank you Melissa you did a great job!

  11. I have 2 wonderful kids, but have experienced 8 losses after them with no explanation

    Avery 6/11/07
    Addison 2/4/09
    Aiden 12/12/09
    Hayden 6/2/10
    Audrey Rose 1/31/11
    Harrison 7/8/11
    Ashton & Adleigh 12/30/11

    Now I have given up on trying

  12. Melissa, Thank you again for doing this & I too want to say thank you for being brave & breaking the silence. It is still such a forgotten, shameful, uncomfortable thing in our society to talk about child loss & I too want to be a part of changing that! It starts with us Moms & Dads, talking about those babies & allowing God to use their stories. Keep doing what you're doing. :)

  13. Beautiful! Please add John & Breana's Angel 07/27/12

  14. [...] reaching out to other women who have had the same pain. You can see the short video of the Walk at Destiny in Bloom and if you didn’t get to submit your baby’s name and would like to you can leave it in [...]

  15. Wonderful! Brought tears to my eyes!! Very touching!

  16. Thank you so much for doing this for my Precious!

  17. This is beautiful!! I wish i had known about it, definitely will be a part next time! Thank you for doing this :) ~LoriAnn

    My babygirl, Rebekah Aislinn Palmer DOB 10/5/95, DOD 11/30/95

  18. Thank you I burst into tears as I saw my babies name go across the screen!

  19. Thank you, I also burst into tears as I saw my baby boy name go across the screen means so much! <3

  20. So beautiful. Please add Baby Girl Henriott 08/29/2012. Thank you soon much!

  21. Please add Rose Marie Boudreau (7/11/12). This is beautiful – thank you!

  22. Thank you for the work you do. You give courage to those who don't feel like they have any left. Please add my two babies to your banner…. Webb baby girls (26/8/08 and 27/8/09.)

  23. Thank you, its beautiful. Could you please add my daughter, Molly Mae Barus, 5/30/2012

  24. Thank you! Thank you! This means so much to us.

  25. Thank you!!!

  26. Hannah, I just want to say that you have tugged at my heart today, sister. I am praying for you. For all of us. Thank you for sharing each of your babies with us. They are so loved.

  27. I lost my second at 5 months along. My doc was great and encouraged me not to let anyone tell me that this wasn't a life loss, but to grieve, and then to remember him. Each year our Christmas tree has a tiny silver angel with the name Tyler James, inscribed on it. It reminds us that he was – and is now waiting for us with the Lord. Thanks for this great celebration of these lives.

  28. My (Cara's) three angels.

    Baby A 10.31.2007
    Baby B 10.31.2009
    Baby C 09.07.2012

  29. Thank you for doing this. We lost our son 6 years ago but I was never allowed to grieve, which made our lose that much greater. It is so wonderful to celebrate our son even if I never really knew him. Thank you again. This means so much!!!

  30. Thank you!!! So beautiful!! I am so touched that others took their time to remember babies that weren't theirs. It was so nice to see my sweet daughters' name. Thank you again!

  31. Thank you so much! It means so much for me (and all of us) for others to honor our children as well as their mothers. ((hugs))

  32. Thank you for honoring my daughter Angel Marie Wilson. It means so much to me to see that so many people do care about our precious babies that we've all lost.

  33. thank you i found my braidys name who was meant to be born 02/12/2011 but i lost on the 18/05/2011 i love you forever and always lil one xxx

  34. Gamaliel Barragan 01-09-2008

  35. Thank you for doing this….so beautiful. Can you please add my angel "Fancy Heart 3/10/2012"

  36. Thank you from the bottom of my heart! Thank you for remembering my daughter and so many other precious babies.

  37. Evan David Michael 6/23/11-11/21/11 ❤

  38. Thank u so much for honoring my daughter and sharing this with us <3

  39. I lost my daughter at 4 1/2 months and it was unknow why until this year. My daughter name is Angel Christ Mckinley 12/02/2011 got pregnant again and lost my baby again at 5 week did not know the sex so we name it Phoenix Parker Mckinley 4/25/2012 I am now almost 6 1/2 months along with a baby boy his name is Wyatt James Mckinley and he is due 01/31/2013.

  40. Please add Baby Fetters-April 2011 and Baby Fetters-August 2011

  41. Thank you so much for remembering my son, Wesley Jacob Goins along with my friend's daughter, Keely Gale. I know neither one of them have been forgotten by us and now haven't been forgotten by others, either. Thank you again so much.