On Sunday October 14, 2012 we gathered together to honor over 600 sweet babies who had been lost to miscarriage, stillbirth, infant death, SIDS, birth defects and abortion by handwriting their names onto a banner.
We also partnered with Intelligender, Beyond Words Designs and Beautifully-Chaotic.com to host the We Remember You Walk where we walked to honor the lives of the babies as well as the grief of their parents and families and also to raise money to purchase Art Cards to be distributed by Dr’s and Hospitals to women experiencing a loss.
Today we are so happy to announce we also have a very special gift from the author of Empty Arms, Hope FIlled Heart, Kristine Lemus. She is making her e-book available as a free gift from her to every babyloss mama who wants it. It is a beautiful prayer for any woman who has lost a child. You can download it Here and read more from Kristin at www.thebeautifuldeep.com. it will be available as a gift for one week ending Oct 23, 2012.
You can also view and download high-quality images of the walk, including close up shots of every section of the banner so you can find and download the picture with your baby’s name on it at Beautifully-Chaotic.
Why do we do all this?
The loss of a child is something no mother should have to go through. But sadly, 1 in 4 women will experience the loss of a baby through miscarriage, stillbirth or infant death. So how is it with numbers that vast so many women walk through it alone?
I remember sitting on a couch, surrounded by about 50 amazing women in my Lifegroup (my church’s name for bible studies) just a week or so after finding out that instead of a baby 12 weeks along, I was carrying a baby who had passed at 8 weeks and I would have to have surgery to remove my baby. I had the surgery and had recovered enough to go back to my group. As much as I wanted nothing more that morning than to lie in bed and cry I knew I needed to be there.
I can’t remember exactly how I ended up talking about it but somehow the whole mess spilled out of me in a torrent of tears and raw pain: I hurt. I hurt so badly I could hardly breathe sometimes. I was confused. I was angry. I was SO angry. I would go to sleep crying and wake up crying with my pillow so soaked I must have been crying while I was asleep. I would have confusing dreams that the whole miscarriage had been nothing but a nightmare and my baby was fine, only to wake and have the whole reality crash down on me again and again and again. I felt so alone and lost…
I can see the group leader’s face so clearly in my mind still, her eyes were so full of compassion as she turned to the entire group crammed in her living and dining room and asked how many women there had experienced a miscarriage or loss. The rooms were peppered with the raising of hands. I was shocked to see how many of my friends, not just people I kind-of knew, but friends had lost a baby. I had no idea.
Then she spoke the words that first set me on the path to healing, “Honey, you need to grieve; your family needs to grieve. You lost a family member, a child. So many times we don’t give enough weight to losses like this and don’t find healing because we never grieve … take time to do that.”
I learned that day that I was not alone and as I drove away after group I made two decisions that have proved to be incredibly important…life-altering even.
I would grieve and find healing.
I would live my life with my hand raised so no one I knew or that my voice could reach would ever feel as alone in their grief.
If you have lost a baby I want you to know you are not alone. I am so sorry for your loss. All of us who joined together, we are so sorry for your loss. Please feel free to honor the life of your child by leaving their name/date in the comment section below and I will add all names left by Tuesday Oct 23, 2012 to the banner and upload pictures of that section to Beautifully-Chaotic.
I will remember them with you.
We will remember them with you.