God is doing something. And I know what you’re thinking, “Really? You’re so deep, Kelli!” But it is so deep. He is doing something in me that reaches to the very depths of all that is in me. Sometimes I know God is working on me and I don’t like it because it’s ugly and it hurts. But then there are the times when I’ve gone through all the ugliness and I start to come out on the other side and see the beauty He has created out of an ugly mess (usually created by yours truly!) That’s where I feel like I’m at right now. Don’t get me wrong, there is plenty of ugly mess left in me but He’s at work and I can feel it. And I like it. There are so many things He is doing right now in my heart and in our lives but for now I wanted to share about something He spoke to me this week.
Our Pastor is doing a series on Fear and so I have been thinking a lot about it lately. Oh how well I know the ugliness and pain of fear. I have spent the majority of my 31 years on this earth gripped by fear. Fear of many things. Fear of death, illness, financial ruin, people not liking me, etc, etc.! Most people are scared and they don’t know what causes it or even realize the source of their anxiety. But I know the truth. I know fear is a sin that grips me and I wrestle with it like a venomous snake that is wrapped around my neck. But I also know the truth and the truth is that there is freedom. I don’t have to live like this. Through Christ there is freedom. I have received this freedom time and again when the enemy throws a fiery dart my way and I grab it with the truth and send it flying the other way. Then there are the times when I am trying to do it all in my own strength and power and I let that fiery dart come straight for me and nail me right in the forehead. This is when I believe Satan’s lies, I start listing all the “what if’s” and I begin to have physical symptoms caused from being anxious. It is a downward spiral from there. It doesn’t have to be like this. I have a choice.
So this week I was thinking about when I was a little girl. Every summer we used to go on vacation to South Padre Island. The first few summers we went I was very afraid of the ocean. I would walk along the beach just to the edge of where the waves would roll in. I didn’t want the water to touch my feet. One summer (I think I was 4 years old) I finally got brave enough to walk where the water barely touched my feet as the waves rolled in. I had found my freedom and was enjoying walking and playing on the beach. Well all of a sudden out of nowhere a giant horse dog (really just a dog but it was the size of a horse!) came running behind me. So I did what any normal little girl would do and started running for my life! I was running down the coast line of South Padre Island scared out of my mind while the giant horse dog thought we were playing a game and ran behind me. My parents were screaming for me to stop running but I knew they must be crazy telling me to stop. I kept running and running. My Dad was running behind yelling for me to stop so that he could scoop me up and walk me back to our family. But all I could think of was being eaten alive by this ginormous horse dog if I stopped. I was exhausted (after all I was no 4 year old athlete you know!) but I had to keep running.
And then it hit me. God brought this memory to mind this week and then He spoke. He said, “Kelli, don’t you see. You’re still acting like you’re a little girl. You’re running for your life letting the fears of this world chase you like a big ginormous horse dog. And I’m running beside you screaming at you to stop. Pleading with you to just trust me enough to stop and I’ll scoop you up and carry you to safety. Yet you’re running, exhausted, trying to do it all on your own when I could carry you. Just trust me.”
I can’t tell you how powerful it has been to have this image ingrained into my heart. I’m done running. I’ve been scooped up in my Daddy’s arms. It is here I find rest, safety, security and peace. It is here I find everything I need.
1 Those who live in the shelter of the Most High
will find rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
2 This I declare about the Lord:
He alone is my refuge, my place of safety;
he is my God, and I trust him.
Psalm 91:1-2
Great application of that memory!! It really helped me to see how ridiculous I am when I run in fear. And how it truly is running away from God, whether I acknowledge it or not. And how, even harsher, it’s really that ugly word – disobedience. Yesterday I was reading in 1 Samuel and Saul was rejected as king because He didn’t listen to the voice of the Lord. I have chapters in my own life filled with troubles that came from not listening too.
You’ve got a way of keeping things simple in your writing that makes truth real easy to grasp and hold on to. I’m sure your kids will be flourish from that as they grow, and you make it real easy to meet and know the living God. Be blessed, and thanks for writing!
Awesome post Kelli! So encouraging… now if only I can keep reminding myself of this
Kelli,
Thank you for sharing your struggles with fear. I, too, have struggled with fear all of my life. Satan would have me believe I’m the only one that struggles so much with fear, but when others share the same struggles, somehow it gives perspective and freedom. God bless you and your family!
Thank you, Kelli. The way you write I was able to imagine all of it exactly. You are so right, if only we will quit running and allow Him to hold us and carry us through. I believe this applies to lots of areas in our lives.
How ridiculous it is for us as belivers to forget that we don’t have to carry our fears by ourselves. Yet we continue to take back those things from God that He so willingly has offered to carry for us and we lug them around ourselves, knowing the whole time we don’t have to. A great reminder, Kelli, that we don’t have to do it on our own.
Amazing writer, great story, and an even more powerful meaning. I’ve never really stopped running from fear because of the fear of what will happen when I actually stop and listen. This is more than just a story for me. It’s inspiration, hope, and truth.
Kelli that was amazing! Thanks so much for sharing that story! Praise the Lord we don’t have to keep running.
Kelli,
You have really hit the nail on the head. Keep up the writing. You have a talent and you should share it with others.
Cheryl
Thank you so much for that devotional. I admire your passion for God and your strength. I loved the symbolism of that memory. It most definitely hit home for me. Thanks again.
VERY inspirational!!! You have a wonderful way of putting into words what so many are feeling/thinking!
Thank you for your constant encouragement and for your testimony!
Kelli, this post is one of your finest! I love your sweet heart and your eagerness to be transparent to help others learn from what you are going through. Keep it up, girl!!
Wow. Your words brought me to tears. God is so much bigger than our fears and I pray I can give all mine straight to Him. He is my refuge! Thanks for loving Jesus, Kelli! Your words really encouraged me today.
WOW! I love it when God shows us his truths in simple ways that we can understand. You really painted a picture of exactly what I do when I am afraid! When you were a little girl, I’m sure you never dreamed that he could use that huge dog chasing you for good…but look what he did!
Absolutley brilliant! Thanks so much for letting God use you to speak to mi struggles! Thanks Kelli!
Awesome Kell!!! So very true. I’m so thankful for woman like you!
Kelli,
So inspiring! Thank you!
Thank you for sharing your memory & reminding me all we have to do is trust & believe in god & he will take care of everything else. God bless you & your family.
Love the word picture you used to illustrate your story. Fear is such a vicious trap the enemy uses to hold us captive, women especially I think. I remember the DAY that I lookd over my shoulder so to speak and realized that I had finally embraced and allowed the holy spirit to capture my heart and that overwhelming constant FEAR trap was gone. Not to say I don’t have to run back to that freedom now and again but I totally relate to your story, just REALIZING running away from the ginormous dog (hilarious and fabulous wording by the way) was not the way my Father had intended for me to find safety. Thanks for sharing so candidly.
It is so cool how God deals with us the same today as he has been since the beginning of time. It is always so affirming when reading others describe their experiences with God in the same words we use to describe ours even though we are much older and went through them many years ago. Thanks you Kelli for your awesome words. The journey is beautiful no matter what we see today.
Wow! That is just what I needed to hear and be reminded of today!!! I find myself being gripped by fear a lot lately and I need to remember to just let God scoop me up and carry me…thank you for sharing!
Kelli, thank you so much for the reminder that we don’t have to live in fear. We have an amazing Heavenly Father to take care of us as long as we will allow him to. Thanks for your encouraging words.
Kelli,
I love your picture of how God scoops us up in times of fear, sadness, hard places, etc. Thanks for your writing……….it was a great reminder of God and how He loves and takes care of us individually! Love your writing……..thanks for sharing!
Loved this. Such a GREAT picture of a very real problem in my life. Thank you for writing. Now to work on stopping and letting my Father carry me to safety.
Powerful message. Fear is something that can grip and impact us all. Max Lucado recently presented a Town Hall message on Fear tied to his latest book Fearless. You can view it and sign up (not a mailing list) to stand agaist fear here. http://townhall.maxlucado.com/signatures/
Great read … and great story! I love how God uses the every day things in our lives to teach us His great lessons…but isn’t that what our lives are all about? You’re a winner… and I’m glad we’re friends! …hugs…bev
Kelli, What an awesome word! God never wastes an experience. Thank you for sharing your sweet heart, you inspire me!
What a well-written beautiful revelation! Thank you so much for sharing, Kelli. Fear is definitely something I struggle with on a daily basis and what stood out to me the most was when satan throws fiery darts my way, I can grab and send them back by taking my thoughts captive.
I think as women we especially struggle with fear. I’ll be worrying about something (usually about the kids) and ask my husband what he thinks. I don’t know why I bother because he calmly says EVERY TIME, “God is in control, don’t worry”. Geez! Thanks Babe. Not only am I worrying about something that is completely irrational (Does my baby have Autism?? He got bit by mosquitos yesterday – does he have West Nile Virus??) but then my husband has to remind me of the truth that God IS in control and my worrying about it is not going to help one bit. The Enemy loves when he can get in our minds and keep us up at night with worry. Don’t give him the satisfaction ladies! Take EVERY thought captive! Thanks Kelli for sharing.
Kelli: What a powerful devotion! Exactly what I needed to hear, the timing couldn’t have been more perfect. I can’t wait to read more or your postings. God IS working in you and He’s using you to minister to others. Thank you.
What an incredible story and awesome reminder! I can so relate!!! I have to remember that God is so much bigger than all my fears!! Thanks for being willing to share online & for being so transparent, it is such an encouragement to know we are not alone in this battle! Keep writing and sharing…it is such a blessing!
thanks for sharing kelli! i love it! sweet encouragement!!!
That was so amazing. It really made think about my own life and how I need to just let everything go and trust him.
Kelli….thank you for sharing your heart! Your story is such an encouragement and a great reminder of how God always takes care of his children. I love the illustration and I know it will always stick with me! You have such a gift with words.
Thank you for the fantastic reminder and encouragement! What a great picture of our Father’s love for us.
I love that image, Kelli!
Well said Kelli! Thanks for the reminder to trust our heavenly father! You paint a beautiful picture!
Kelli…..WOW! I have really been struggling with so many different types of fear and reading your post was exactly the pratical reminder that I needed. It totally brought tears to my eyes, I may have to come back and read it daily because fear seems to be something that we never stop dealing with. Thank-you for sharing your gift of putting thought to word in a way that we can all relate to and understand…..God Bless!!!
Love this, Kelli! Thank you for sharing, you reminded me that God is so loving and does not desire us to fear.
Kelli….We never know how and when God will use the experiences of our life to bring Him glory. I am still amazed (not sure why – you think I would get it by now) how in His perfect timing God brings a thought to mind where He shows us that as one of his own He has a plan for us and is ALWAYS at work in us. Thanks for the reminder and for such a great example of how God can take a difficult circumstance and use it for good. Beautifully written – you are a great example to many.
Kelli: Thank you so much for letting God use the experiences in your daily life to touch and encourage others. Your story reminds me of how God says “unless we become like a little child………….” I have no doubt He allowed that ginormous horse dog encounter when you were a child so that He could use it to bless and teach you as an adult — and in addition, to bless the lives of others of us who struggle with fear. I love the way God speaks to us through the every day occurrences of our lives, that He makes it so personal, and that He’s big enough to do that for millions of people all at the same time!! God bless you Kelli. Keep writing!
Kelli, thank you for this word. How powerful it is to see how God works in others’ lives and to see that others’ share our struggles! Very edifying. Blessings to you and your family.
Hey Kelli, Wow…loved your post! Very encouraging thoughts for us to embrace and remember in times like these. I so look forward to your next post!! Kim Himes
Awesome post Kelli! You are a very talented writer and I love reading your updates!!
I am such a chicken myself and I really understand being gripped by fear!!! Great word picture!!! I too find myself learning to overcome fear with the Lord’s strength over and over again!!! I think having 4 kids brings those moments more frequently! Haha! Great blog!
Your post touched my heart – how wonderful for God to give you a vision of your earthly father’s protection and love as an example of what God wants to do for you! Keep opening your heart and mind to what God wants to show you Kellii – God has wonderful plans for your life!
Excellent, timely post. I love the imagery! Thank you for such a thoughtful application.
What a gifted writer, Kelli! Thank you for sharing what the Lord is doing (and being vulnerable) in your life as an encouragement to others. Can’t wait to read more!
Sweetheart, I am so proud of you for being so vulnerable and honest about your struggle with fear. What an amazing revelation God has given you in your walk with Him! And by reading all the comments, it also struck a chord with many others. I am so thankful and blessed to have you as my wife and mother to our amazing children! God is truly glorified in you Honey, no matter what the Ginormous Horse Dog says! : )
How greatly you are LOVED my friend! (umm…look at all the amazing comments.
I am so blessed by your openness and your determination to conquer fear, inspiring us too as well! Keep writing ALL that’s in your heart it’s evident GOD is in it! What blessing you and your blog have been to DIB!
Great Love!
~Ris
Loved your post Kelli! Your illustration is a great example of God’s desire to rescue us from fear if we will only stop running and listen to His voice. Thanks for sharing your heart in such an encouraging story.
I love how God speaks to us! We have been talking about “God being our refuge” for the past few weeks up at the Lodge (our precious 5th & 6th graders) ~ something Todd and I wanted the kids to especially remember as they began the new school year. Thank you for your story and your encouragement.
Kelli what a writer you are! Thanks for sharing your struggles with fear. It’s sometimes hard to admit what we struggle with to other people wondering what they would think of us. It’s good to know that we are loved by someone so much bigger and it is He who wants to take away our fears. I love your example of the dog. I am glad we have God to look towards when we are going through Fear.
WOW Kelli!! I love your blog and feel so blessed to have you share it with us at DIB! Your cute, funny, popular (obviously), AND deep!!
What a gift you are!
What an amazing picture that you painted! It is just the image I needed to see at this time in my life. You have an incredible way with words. It is beautiful to see how you allow God to speak through you. Many Blessings to you!!
Kelli, you are an amazing writer! Thanks for sharing that great story – love the visual of the ginormous horse dog – hilarious as usual! Your wit, humor and, most of all, faith are such a blessing to those who know you. Keep those stories coming!
Kelli-
I loved reading your story. It’s another great example that god is in control of our lives and through him we can live the life he has made for us.
You have such a way with words. Thanks for sharing this personal story and wonderful reminder with us.
Wow Kelli! That was great! While I love all your humorous yet truthful stories about the boys and life in general, I love this for application in my own life. I live in fear about stupid things all the time (someone under my bed, in my house, stepping out on faith), and I try to remind myself it is the devil. I love the picture of the Lord scooping us up if we will just stop running!! So great! Keep it up girl!
Kelly, What a wonderful read. I did not know that you were so talented. I was able to read your heart. God Bless. Denny & Nancy
It is confirmed; we are definately beach people at Keystone! I loved the picture of being scooped up in Daddy’s arms!! Our knee-jerk response often leads us away from that safe place of peace. Listening for His voice (as in your story) is the provided way out from the grip of the fear monster (or ginormas dog). Thanks for sharing with your gift of writing!
Great piece Kelli. Thanks for sharing!
awesome! such encouraging words from the Lord through you.
We used to go to South Padre Island when I was a little girl too! I loved your story! I can relate to those fiery darts! I finally started to speak the word just this week and it is amazing the power of God through His word!
Blessings,
Lori
The Bargain Shopper Lady
Ouch! I think you wrote these words just for me to hear today. With a brand new baby home from the hospital this week, I have been wrestling with fear like crazy. I FEEL like life is going too well (now that I have two little boys) and something horrible must be about to happen, but I KNOW that is not the character of our Lord. He is a gracious God who wants us to be happy, lavishing His gifts upon us. Thank you for reminding me of that and sharing your amazing word picture of the ginorous horse dog.
Kelli,
What an encouraging reminder of how very loved and protected we are. . .sometimes in spite of ourselves! Sharing your story has been a blessing to me today. Thanks!
Kelli,
Such a great story! You truly have an amazing talent with writing. Thank you for blessing us all and for the reminder that God is in control.
Great writing Kelli and great insight. Thanks for sharing. God is in control. God is Good.
What a great article! You are a very grown up young wife and Mom. We are very proud of you!
Bobbie and Tommy
Thanks Kelli for sharing! I think everybody that reads this can relate it to their own lives and really feel encouraged! You are such an awesome writer!
Kelli – I’ve so struggled with fear…right now, I was thinking about it before I got on this blog – thanks for writing – it means a lot to me!
What a great word to end the day with. Thank you for your words of encouragement. We so desire our kids to want/need our help. I tend to forget that God waits on us to lean on Him in the same way. Your story is such a great visual reminder. Isn’t it incredible that our Savior is our Daddy!
Aww…Kell…
you are an inspiration! thank you for being soo open and sharing! <3
Hey Kelli thanks for sharing that good word.
I looked at all these comments and thought, “Does that say 17?! Nope it really says 71!!” Then, I thought about it! What is more disturbing, more gripping, more incapacitating in our lives that fear?!! Many things have been a renewing of my mind by applying His Word which changes my actions! Many things have just been me pressing into Him for healing and transformation, but THIS ugly fear thing is so perfectly put as a snake around your neck squeezing out the life and breath!! Fear can make my entire body hurt and freeze me in time! It can make me push people away that God is bringing to my heart! It can truly do a venomous work and it takes battle gear to drive it out of town!! Thanks, Kelly !I hope you can read 72 comments!!:) Livin Love, Sacha
My goodness! I read this blog on Tuesday morning, one day later than most, and I find myself standing behind 72 other people in the comment line. Amazing!
Your blog has hit home this morning for me. I have had too many moments this past month wondering, in fear, if decisions being made are the right ones. I’ve woken up in the middle night questioning God and I can see through your illustration that I was running afraid. God has scooped me up. He has brought peace in place of the fear. He keeps speaking to me that fear is not from him.
Fear is not from him…
Love your blog! So true about fear, just seems to like to chase us! If we would just stop running, God could just scoop us up! I like that picture.
Blessings!
Such a great post. We all need this reminder daily!
Kelli,
WOW! What an amazing story! Thank you so much for sharing your thoughts. I struggle so much with fear also and God is teaching me this same lesson….to let it go and trust Him! It is great to know I am not alone in my struggles. Thanks for allowing God to use you!
Love,
Kim
What a great reminder of what God wants for each of us…to be free of fear and depend on him!
Kelli,
What a great story and a good reminder of how we don’t have to worry about life’s struggles, because God is always with us. I grew up in a situation where fear surrounded my every move. As an adult, I became entangled in that fear. It took a wonderful loving husband to lead me to a full and complete life with the Lord as my father for me to break those chains that bound me daily. Thank you for reminding me of how strong, powerful, and all-knowing our heavenly Father is!
Kelli, I loved this story! You always have such an amazing, fresh way of sharing a truth from the Lord in a great way that we can all relate to…keep it up! That’s for reminding me how Ginormous our GOD really is!!!